Hey everyone, it’s been a while. Yeah, I kind of reconnected with my inner Picasso and spend most of my time painting, in between doing chores and reading.
Today, I’m here to tell you a story (I’ll make sure to post reviews, T5W, and others soon, don’t worry) but before that, I’ll tell you what spur this on.
Yeah… So, as you may or may not know, I love writing, and I’m working on a Young Adult contemporary novel right now. And one of the things that I have to write about is the first meeting/ first date scene and slow-burn romance.
Let me tell you, I am so crap at that. That was the main reason why most of my Mortal Instruments AU! fanfictions, Alec and Magnus are already in an established relationship. I suck at writing the transition between friends to lovers, or strangers to lovers, or strangers to friends to lovers.
Also, I think, I suck at that because I’ve never really experience that transition (not that I’ve ever experience being in a relationship, but then, an already-there romance is easier to write, in my opinion. Trying to write this scene, and realizing how much I suck at it, and connecting it to my inexperience made me realize something. And made me feel so, so stupid.
Yes everyone, it is story time.
In 2015, I lived in Hawthorn, Victoria between February – June. Somewhere in April, I was walking along Glenferrie Road after going to YO-CHI near ANZ Bank. I was contemplating on going to Coles Supermarket when I accidentally met eye contact with a man. I honestly don’t remember his name now, after two years, but anyways, the man walked over to me after that and asked directions to Swinburne University.
I’ve decided against going to Coles, since I don’t really have anything I wanted to buy anyways, so I gave him directions. The thing is, I kind of suck at giving directions too, so I told him that I’ll show him the way instead. I was going to pass Swinburne on my way to Hawthorn House anyways.
So we walked, turned left near the pedestrian crossing light, and stopped at the second pedestrian crossing light, which was in front of one of the entrances to Swinburne Hawthorn Campus. I told him to just walk straight, and the second building on the right is the Swinburne Library (that’s where he was supposed to go to meet his friend).
After that, we said goodbye and that was that, or so I thought, and I waited for the light to turn green so that I can cross. Apparently, he was still there and he asked if he can add me on Facebook. I didn’t think much about it, I think I kind of have maxed out on the social interaction I can stand for one day and couldn’t think properly, so I just said yes, and gave him my FB.
THEN, he asked for my phone number. Alarms should have been ringing in my head at the time, but I really didn’t think, and just gave him my number. LOL My parents would have freaked if they knew.
Once I’ve returned to Hawthorn House, I went online, accepted his friend request, and we started chatting. He thanked me for showing him how to get to Swinburne, and then he asked what I’m doing. I think I was starting to realize that I practically just gave a complete stranger my number, I kept my answers precise and short. I told him I was looking for an important ring (which I luckily didn’t misplaced or else my mum would’ve kill me). So, he asked, “Wedding ring?”
I laughed, and answered, no, it’s a white gold ring that my mum gave to me and my younger sisters. He replied with “That’s a relief,” but since I was still worried about my ring, I didn’t really think about it much, and said I have to go.
He sent text messages, which I usually reply to because I guess it would be rude not to reply when we’ve been chatting on FB. But even then, I kept my answers kind of vague, in a way, answering his questions without saying that much about myself. One day, he texted me, saying I looked “cute” in one of my pictures on FB, the one where I was wearing contact lens.
Of course, me being me, thought that was kind of creepy (that picture was from 2013, during a family vacation to Maldives), instead of taking it as a compliment. So I just said thanks, and said I was busy and stopped texting him.
A few days later, I was at the library, studying at the quiet section on 3rd floor, when he started a chat on FB (yes, I was studying but come on, I bet most of you have FB or some other social media on when you’re studying). He said he’s in Hawthorn, and asked if I wanted to go out for coffee and catch up. I was studying but I could still make time for coffee break, but instead, I gave him excuses and said I couldn’t. One, because I have social anxieties and the idea of talking to someone that’s not my close friends, without anyone else there is kind of scary. And two, I was still feeling a little creeped out.
I thought, after I said no the first time, he would stop. But he was persistent and still kept on asking. And commenting on pictures, which at that time, made me feel more creeped out.
Seriously, I’m sorry about that. But that’s what happens when you say that kind of things to me while looking at old pictures. Because you know, 2013! Why were you looking so far back in the first place? And also, I am a little bit paranoid, so yeah. And again, anxieties…the idea of being somewhere with someone one-on-one makes me panic.
Anyways, one day, I think he kind of figured out I didn’t want to go. He said if I didn’t want to go, just say so in the first place. And we severed all contacts. But at that time, I was just relieved that he’ll stop asking, and I was also wondering why he was that mad about not getting coffee together, since we’re more strangers than friends.
A few days after I returned to Malaysia, my aunt, my sister and I went to Starbucks after breaking fast (It was near the end of Ramadhan at that time). I told them about the coffee thing, and saying, “What would we catch up on when we don’t have anything to catch up on?”
And whoa, they were like…giving me this “how can you read so much but still be so oblivious about the signs” look when they answered. At that time, I was kind of, turning a deaf ear on them. But now, in 2017, I think about it, and I kind of realized what they were saying without them saying it and realized that they were right.
I really should have asked my sister’s counsel instead of my equally unexperienced friend at that time. Hahaha
So yeah, my 2017 realization that I have made is…he was asking me OUT on a coffee DATE. And I really, really felt so stupid, especially after watching Alfie Deyes’s vlog last night. Apparently, coffee date is a thing for strangers. Huh, who knew?
The point I’m making is… I fail at writing something subtle because that DISASTROUS experience of mine shows that I couldn’t pick up on subtle hints.
*sigh* So yeah…this is the end of our story time. I’ll make sure to post this week’s T5W post, late but better than never, soon-ish. And maybe I’ll post a review too.
Until next time,